As I was on my way to work this morning, after making sure that the challah dough was rising, the chicken soup defrosting, the hot water urn filled and ready to be plugged in, the table set and the candles ready, I wondered what I would write about this week for my “Greetings”. As always, the Torah reading of the week, in this case Shmot, contains timely lessons for generations past and future.
In particular I would like to focus on the role the women played in not only setting the stage for the unfolding history of the Am Yisrael but actually producing, directing, encouraging and nourishing the nation and its leaders. The “Nashim Tzidkaniyot”, נשים צדקניות, the righteous women, are the unsung heroes behind the ultimate redemption of the Jews and yetziat mitzrayim, יציאת מצרים, the exodus from Egypt.
There is a famous quote attributed to Canadian screenwriter Nia Vardalos which says “The man may be the head of the household. But the woman is the neck, and she can turn the head whichever way she pleases.” If we examine the role of the women in this week’s parsha, we can attest to the truth of this statement. Where do we begin? It begins with the women’s unwavering faith in Hakadosh Baruch Hu, throughout the most depressing and difficult time of slavery and the insistence, even subtly, of continuing family relationships and having children and families. We learn that the women despite Pharaoh’s edict to kill any new male baby born, nevertheless took chances to have children. The midwives claimed that they could not curb the birth rate because the women were like “Chayot” - they gave birth quickly and easily.
We are all familiar with the story of Moshe’s being rescued by Batya, Pharaoh’s daughter, and how Miriam, Moshe’s sister, convinced her that the baby needed a “wet nurse” to feed him, thus ensuring that the future leader of Israel was nurtured by his own loving, Jewish mother. Literally from behind the scenes, Miriam and Yocheved are directing the course of Jewish history.
Batya herself plays an important role in rescuing Moshe. The pasuk reads that when Batya saw the baby in the floating basket ותשלח את אמתה - commonly translated as “and she sent her maidservant.” Rashi, however, adds the midrashic explanation, that she stretched out her hand and it grew long enough to reach the basket. Whether or not we take the midrash literally the meaning is clear - Batya went above and beyond her seemingly limited capabilities to save the baby. In a time of stress women can, and do, go beyond their potential. Even when one thinks they cannot accomplish their tasks, goals, dreams, if no effort is put in surely they will fail, But if they (men or women alike) try, if they reach out, if they have confidence in their abilities, there are no limits.
Recently our shul began a Hashkama minyan on Shabbat morning, and we daven outside, masked and socially distanced. There is only one challenge with this and that is getting a minyan on time. It is often very frustrating for me, as I am the only woman who is devoted (crazy?) enough to get up so early, and even if there are nine men, I seemingly don’t count! Even more so, there is no women’s section set-up, so I often sit behind the doors leading to the shul patio. I should be upset by this, but in reality I am not. I appreciate my role as being parallel, not less, not more, equal but different. I also enjoy the solitude of conversing with Hashem without distractions and I enjoy being an observer. Hakadosh Baruch Hu created women to be “ עזר כנגדו”- a helpmate in opposition or, as I interpret it, a parallel associate.
We are often asked by prospective parents if we could sum up what is the mission of Sha’arei Bina. I told a parent this week that our goal is to educate young women, to guide them to think critically, to develop knowledge, skills and a moral compass, so that they will have a healthy self-confidence to make wise choices. In short, at SBTAG we want to empower women without turning over mechitzot!
Have a Shabbat Shalom
Rochelle Brand, Ed.D
Head of School
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